What depression is

Depression is not just crying It's not just being sad all the time Depression is not brushing your teeth for days It's not showering reguarly despite knowing you smell It's leaving on your makeup and not doing skincare, despite knowing you'll get skin irritation in the morning It's letting your bedroom get messier and messier,... Continue Reading →


It's dark in this room, but it has to be The light coming through the window is painful despite the lack of sunlight and the rain clouds filling the sky. Even so harsh light burns into my eyeballs. I keep my blinds shut and lay on my back, my lower back sinks into the dip... Continue Reading →


Let's just pretend I didn't disappear for months. Hello, if anyone is friends with me they know I'm like an endless running motor, always shaking, moving, talking or doing something weird. When I first heard about stimming (a repetitive action that autistic people find soothing), I thought I didn't really stim or do anything like... Continue Reading →


I feel weak and I feel heavy. The desk is shaking with every word I type so I've had to move back to my bed. I feel so bad this morning; I'd had a rough night as in I flipped out to a friend for something that is not even real. Maybe I ought to... Continue Reading →

A Paperchase panic

Monday, somewhere between 1-3pm. Paperchase, Selfridges After my friend wanted to take pictures of the window displays, we took a look around the Paperchase in order to find a Christmas present for a family member (I had something in mind). There it was, the perfect gift. £5. Perfect. I could buy it now or come back... Continue Reading →

Monthly meltdown

Yup, it's that time of the month...no no no, not my period but my meltdown. I'll have at least one every month. When I was younger I used to describe it as 'I have to cry randomly sometimes otherwise my tears build up and overflow'. Now I guess I have an explanation? So it's just... Continue Reading →

My mood has peaked

It's official. My mood has reached it's peak. All I can think is 'how long will this last'. Truthfully, I never want it to end. Autumn is my favourite time of year so maybe that's why I'm on anti-depressant medication so maybe that's why I have control of my college project so maybe that's why... Continue Reading →

A list of comforts

When I've become run down and unable to do anything, I have to be comforted. I prefer to be in my room which I've found to be my own personal bubble where things are kept how I like. Here's some things that I find comforting in times of struggle: Pressure. Not mental pressure as in... Continue Reading →

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